daughter: (trying to open the front door) heyyyyy! why the hell is the table in front of the door?
little tobin: i saw paranoia…
daughter: are you serious?! … you saw that over 2 months ago!
little tobin: that s**t sticks with you!
(warning: movie not safe for mothers prone to booby trapping)
(at this point we have sat through 10 mins of this “film” they are calling Pacific Rim)
little tobin: (in a loud whisper) hey, what the hell is this shit?
daughter: i don’t freakin’ know, you picked it!
little tobin: hell i did! this is so not for us…
daughter: completely agree!
little tobin: let’s ditch this crap…
(The Heat is starting across the hallway – we scurry)
little tobin: ahhhh, this is where we belong… even the seats are more comfy…
daughter: yeah this is much more our speed.
(exiting the theater)
little tobin: that was HYSTERICAL! so glad i spoke up so you didn’t torture me with that other picture…
daughter: once again it was NOT MY PICK!
little tobin: sure, sure… if you say so…
(4 thumbs up for The Heat. female buddy cop film makes our night!
ZERO thumbs for that loud scary movie with monsters/machines and a camp full of teen boys in the audience.. ugh)
little tobin: wasn’t that cinematography just amazing?, i think that was the best movie i have seen this year,
it was just so beautiful and the actors were fabulous. what did you think?
daughter: it’s official – i will now have nightmares for the rest of my life! oh and i was asleep for the first half…
little tobin: you freakin’ whoosie! get over it, it was amazing. there was nothing you liked about it?
daughter: well i was glad to see the little guy from love actually got another job… those dogs were so SCARY!
little tobin: you are nuts! it’s make-believe…
daughter: who says!?
2 thumbs up (obviously from little tobin)
(it’s a snowy saturday afternoon as the unassuming postman arrives at our door…)
little tobin: (greeting him at the door) well hello, you don’t happen to have netflix for us?
mr. postman: uh, yeah seems like i have 2, here you go.
little tobin: oh GREAT! ok wait, i need to open these and see what one is a duplicate.
my daughter went and got one at the video store for me last night, do you know there are still video stores?, but it was already in our queue and now i think you are delivering it. so i need to open these, double-check and then i can give you back the one i don’t want and you can send it on back to the netflix people. sound good?
mr. postman: ma’am, i can’t wait for you to do whatever you just told me you are going to do.
little tobin: oh puhleaseeee. yes you can.
(mr. postman waited – smart choice man…)
daughter: that running was fantastic! i need to run like that…
little tobin: that will never happen in your lifetime…
daughter: yeah i can’t make it once around that track – another dream squashed.
(we 80% liked it, 100% loved javier bardem but will have nightmares about his blonde hair)
daughter: that is exactly why i do not have kids.
little tobin: why didn’t they just let that poor man go back to his wife, that’s all he wanted.
daughter: huh? i think i fell asleep during that part. i am going to have nightmares about that kid.
little tobin: i think we needed some drugs to enjoy that one. Next time it’s your pick.